Hey Gossip Girl
Question for tumblr’s own little Jenny Humphry:
Do you really want to start at a new school and immediately burn all of your bridges? Like, before you’ve had class with us and such?
xoxo
Holy shit. The mean girls of Tumblr are here. Don’t fuck with the Queen Bees, bitches, lest you get suurrved.
UPDATE: Scandal! Post deleted! Weak sauce! Listen: no shame in your game, until now. This place needs some ice-cold motherfuckers up in hurr - everyone likes a clean city, but nobody wants to take out the trash. Keep it real, Little J, and put it back up. Keep. It. Real.
PS - True story: I was walking home after work through Fort Greene park two summers ago with Henry, and three menacing looking men* coming out of the Walt Whitman peejay’s, and approach us on the corner of Myrtle and Portland, parkside. I’m smoking a cigarette. The largest of the three asks me not for a cigarette, but for that cigarette, the one that I’m smoking. I wouldn’t want to misquote him, but it was something like: “GIMME YO CIGGARETTE!” I rebuff him (in retrospect: stupidly) with a response akin to “Are you joking? Do you know how much these things cost, here?” He replied by growling at me - something like “GIMMEMOTHAFUCKA” - and grabbing the lit cigarette out of my two fingers. When it not only crumbled, but burned him, he castigated me: “LOOKWHATYOUMADEMEDO, MOTHAFUCKA! FUCK THAT, PUNK!” With that, he and his companions walked away. Two teenagers across the street were watching the entire time. As we crossed the street - slightly shaken, admittedly - they criticized our (Swiss?) diplomacy tactics: “If that were me, I would’ve punked that bitch! This is Fort Greene! You gotta rep the Fort Greene, baby!” To which I replied:
“I’m a white Jewboy standing in front of the Walt Whitman Projects; I like Fort Greene, but not enough to represent it in the manner of getting my ass handed to me in broad daylight.”
This having been spoken, they concurred. In regards to the above situation, they would not concurr. You have a chance to “rep the Fort Greene” where I did not. Take it, please. Do it for Whitman. He wouldn’t want punks running around Tumblr either.
*Euphamisms! Hooray!